I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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