I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I am naked and annoyed.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
