I didn't shave. On purpose
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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