i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
