.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize