reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
