Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
