Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
