We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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