im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize
