You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
