I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
No subtext here. People are naked.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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