Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
