I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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