walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
