he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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