If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
