I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
