I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
