I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
