I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
