Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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