Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
