So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I will pee on everything he values.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
