I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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