I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
