are you still at the devil's house?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
