With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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