I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
