Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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