belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
