so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
So here I am, sexting at work.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize