i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
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