Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize