Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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