just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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