Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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