1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
