you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
