I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
