who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
