i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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