Jerry, you need to find god
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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