Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
