I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
