hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
