You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
