this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
