we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
