you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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