we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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