i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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