Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
